Relationship-- Delicate and Dedicate

Salutations to those of my loved ones, who made me, feel them as my resources, rather than liabilities. Relationships we have in this world are explained in different ways. Some explain them as headache and some as caretakers and some even don’t know who they are all. But to say truly relationships we have in this world are resources, for us to benefit together. So such relationships are like a vast land, which should be nurtured and/or managed properly. If left uncultivated weeds and

other wanted things grow in the uncultivated land, and we cannot enjoy the fruit out of it.

The main key to relationships is the Reciprocity/ Mutuality i.e. Give and take. The relationship will not be smooth when always one person gives or receives. In any relationship, we should exchange the currency of what each other’s value.

Nurturing relationship can be done by caring, sharing and loving. This nurturing can be done keeping in touch with our loved ones, sharing with them at least some time with them, and one should never show oneself to be too busy that he cannot spend at least few minutes with them. Relationship thus is a function of co-operation and communication.

Always in relationships some friction and misunderstanding occurs. It is natural. But in such a situation, always any one should come forward and take initiative to put an end to it or else if left unattended, the relationship will be there just for namesake. Even if attended, if taken to a third person for solving the situation it still gets worsened and this small reason is enough to create a crack in the relationship. So in such a crisis it is better to lose ones pride to the one we love, than to lose the one we love due to the pride. In our life there are very rare chances that we will meet a person, whom we love and loves us in return. So just for the sake of small mishaps or faults never abandon your loved ones, because you may never get a person who can replace their position.

Always in relationships, look in to one’s own faults and good thing in others. In love relationships it always happens that we expect a lot from our loved ones and we generally possess the possessiveness for him/her. This possessiveness should always be handled carefully, because it will make our loved ones feel more restricted and denied of his/her freedom to be what they wanted to be. This further might aggravate the suspicious tendency that he/she will leave us and go.

So we try to protect them by trying to be more caring and loving. But when we confront someone with whom our loved ones are quite close and friendly, we conform that they will move away and we tend to avoid and withdraw from them.

Later this avoidance and withdrawal will be interpreted as being abandoned and a long communication gap will be created. Thus from avoiding and disliking the actions of the person will get converted into dislike towards that person as such. This process can be represented diagrammatically as:

Closeness---Expectations---Disappointment---Mourning--Yearning

for the loved ones--Frustration---Aggression---Hatred towards

that person’s act---Withdrawal---Avoidance--Disparity---Hatred

towards that person…(not totally, because it is not possible)

Sometimes a clash between two close persons may be loved ones or friends might result in slightly different form and they might be separated. In such a case it will be too worse because each other know about the other persons’ strength and weakness.

It can be represented diagrammatically as:

Closeness---Expectations---Disappointment---Mourning------------

--Frustration---Aggression---Withdrawal---Avoidance--Do what

that person doesn’t like--Join with those he/she doesn’t like---

--Two groups formed---Politics and war of ego starts

Though love is an irresistible desire to be desired irresistibly, try to handle it carefully and delicately.

Respect each other’s emotions and feelings and let them free and do not try to find fault with them and hurt them. Every one of us should remember this, “DO NOT HURT THE LOVE THAT LOVES YOU AND DO NOT LOVE THE LOVE THAT HURTS YOU”. If handling people is understood then life in this earth will be happy and peaceful and we can make a heaven out of this present world.